Today is not about the big things, it’s about every little thing. The kids have been bickering all day. I spilled pizza cheese on the bottom of the oven and set of the smoke alarm. Twice. I’m typing this in Word so I can copy and paste it later because our internet won’t stay up more than two to three minutes at a time. I just finished reading the book I was going to use for my growth group and one of the core ideas at the end is one I don’t think I can agree with. I agreed to help Frank with his paper but I couldn’t do anything today because I couldn’t do any searches and find any info.
One of my good friends from high school died from cancer this morning. Her baby boy is about Livi’s age. This is not a little thing, but because this has been on my mind, all of the little stuff has exploded.
I wanted to help Frank, to feel like I could help a friend today, but I can’t go online to find any info for him. We have been fighting with our internet for over a month. We had more consistent internet when we were homeless.
I’m frustrated with the kids, but I’m also frustrated with me because I feel like I am not appreciating them. Maylene was a year older than me and so full of life . . . We know better than to take things for granted.
I'm so sorry for the loss of your friend, Ericka *hugs* Sending up lots of prayers for her family and you.
ReplyDeleteMy belief is that God will absolutely use pain in our lives to grow us if we let Him. That being said, we have to be willing to let Him lead us out of that pain and into a new place of healing. He could have made us all autonomous little robots, but He chose to give us free will instead. By that free will, we turned against him because we could, and that is how sin came into the world, and because of our inherent sinful nature, disease and other awful tragedies came into being. So it's not that God is picking which people suffer and which don't, because if He were, we wouldn't have free will anymore and no matter what we did, we couldn't change the eventual outcome, which we know isn't true. I'd be surprised if the author truly had a calvinist point of view; which is, that our entry or denial into Heaven is predetermined and there's nothing we can do about it. God loves all his children and is pursuing each of us to be a part of his kingdom. But Satan uses that free will to try to tell us lies, that nothing we do is good enough, that we are better off on our own.
Perhaps what the author is saying is that God has the ability to see every path our lives could go down, and if we ask Him to be part of HIS plan for us, then we can give our anxiety to Him because He'll lead us exactly where we need to be. Easier said than done, I know. :) God is able to control everything, but he wants us to come to Him out of our own desire, not because He's forcing us to. Only once we decide we WANT God to lead our lives, and we actively invite him to guide us, then He will show us His purpose for us.
Just my opinion, anyway :)
Thanks for the insight, Kelly. Well written and thought provoking. I've also been reading "The Shack" (thanks Shay)and it has some very similar ideas. :)
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