Day Fifty-two 09-10-2010

Wow.  So much has happened in the last two weeks that there was no time for blogging!  Crazy, I know, but it happened!  :)  I haven't read a book in that time either!

There have been a lot of changes around the Cole homestead, including the Cole homestead.  Dan is now making more money per hour and working fewer hours and I am no longer employed.  I am still looking into possible legal action against an employer who failed to follow up on reports of harassment, failed to follow legal guidelines when asking us to move, refused to pay out my vacation because my position was terminated, yet won't allow unemployment because I quit.  Wrong on many levels and certainly skirting the edges of legality, but not sure it would be worth the financial cost.  I hate to just let them get away with treating people the way they have because this was not the first time, I'm sure and you know it's not the last time either.  We need to find Dan a new job that will allow him time to see Payton.  They are trying really hard to understand how Dan connects with our guys so well.  They already told him that once they find a couple to replace us, he won't have that position either.  This means that I need to kick my PartyLite business into high gear so that I can take up the slack when or if that happens.

Payton told me last night that I really needed to get to work on my blog again or start writing a book.  I'm not sure exactly what inspired that, but it was nice to hear.  :)

I have continued my Women 2 Women supplements through out our last couple of weeks of chaos.  Amazingly enough, I have not been having mental or emotional breakdowns on a regular basis.  I haven't noticed any other changes in my PCOS symptoms, but something is changing.  For me to have dealt with all of the stresses of losing a job and a home and moving into a place far smaller than what we've ever had, losing our deposit and my vacation pay, and no breakdowns??  That's a pretty fantastic change of pace.  Well, I did have one minor meltdown, but I'm pretty sure that's a normal thing.  And it's so much better than I have dealt with life in such a long time that I know things are changing!  Now if I could just get the weight, acne and hair loss under control.  :(

I have not been able to ride my bike, but I DID get approval from Work Comp to have at least 6 physical therapy sessions.  Once my hip is not hurting all of the time, that should make bike riding much easier.  Also, Livi started dance class yesterday at DancE Hues.  Miss Cathy was wonderful.  She is a pre-school teacher by day and teaches toddlers to dance by evening.  As the studio is just getting started up, Livi was the only student so she got 30 minutes of one on one instruction.  She was so well behaved and followed instructions perfectly.  She did, of course, try to butt heads when Miss Cathy asked her to count to eight.  Livi said she didn't want to count to eight.  Miss Cathy said she needed to count to four then.  Livi said she didn't want to count to four.  She didn't want to count to eight.  Miss Cathy just said she had to do it, and then she did.  I am going to try to emulate Miss Cathy's tone and strategy with Livi at home.  It was great, but I don't know if I can be that patient.  I will sure try.  At the end of class, Miss Cathy let Livi pick out a sticker.  Livi picked one and the said she wanted two.  Miss Cathy said, "Sorry, only one."  And Livi said, "OK."  So easy.  It's got me re-thinking the way I handle certain situations.  Trying to see if I'm being one of those moms who gives in to avoid conflicts when I'm trying to encourage Livi to be independent.

Mommy starts dance class today.  I have PT this morning at eleven and then I have Adult Hip-Hop at 4.  It's going to be a tight schedule this afternoon because today is one of my guys' birthday.  I made chocolate cupcakes, because they are one of his favorites.  I'll drop Dan off around 2:45 at work, pick up Payton at 3:10 or so, be back at the house for cupcakes at 3:15.  Then I have to eat yummy cupcakes with my buddy and be on my way across town to our house by 3:40 so I can drop the kids off and get to class on time.  Busy, but I think it will work.

We are heading to Quinter this weekend to visit my folks.  My brother and his family will be there also.  We are going to talk to Dan's ex to see if we can have Ash for part of the weekend.  Payton will be at his dad's but my brother may be hauling a bunk bed up here that Daddy bought for the girls so he should get to see them all on Monday or Tuesday.  We have to go to Quinter again next weekend if we are going to be able to let Ash go to her very first volley ball game.  It really sucks that Dan's schedule is so late because he works until 11 and then it's a 4 hour drive.  We won't even be there until 3am.  These are going to be some crazy long weekends.  I am also going to see if I can talk a hometown friend or two into having PartyLite parties so that I can help to defray the costs of the trips.  That way I don't feel like I'm abandoning my business to be with my family.  I have to find a balance until the business is more stable.

I will have Dan help me measure myself as soon as I can find my flexible tape again.  Oh, the joys of unpacking!  :)  And I started my food log again today.  I'm finally beginning to feel like I'm back on track a little.  Next week, I'll build a schedule for when to work my business and when to unpack boxes and when to help the kids organize their rooms.  Being at home finally gives me the chance to get things set up in the most optimal way.  My desk is in the kitchen but there is still room for the table and my bike will be in the laundry/mud room.  It's not ideal, but it's doable.  :)  And a year from now, we are going to move on to bigger and better things!

Day Thirty-five 08-24-2010

Today, everything has finally started getting to me.  I don't know if it's because I quit taking my vitamin D when my new supplement program came in or if it's just a result of all of the changes that we are dealing with right now.  I took some vitamin D tonight, just in case.  I'm thinking I should call the Women to Women help line tomorrow about that.  And do a little research on vitamin D.  I was wondering if it would be good to use the vitamin D as a pick me up on a rough day like today. 

I had a little bit of a melt down tonight.  I know that sounds like I'm trying to candy coat things, but seriously, compared to what a melt down used to consist of, tonight was nothing.  I'm just really tired.  I'm still not getting enough sleep and I don't know when that will change.  I am getting up with Payton and I'm still up past 11.  And once Dan is working 3p-11p shifts, I'll have to bring him to work and pick him up.  I'm going to have to find a way to make it all balance before I crash.  Maybe I can take naps in the afternoon.  hmm . . .  It's a thought.  

I really did accomplish a lot today.  We have a bunch of boxes packed up now and we'll be picking up the keys and signing our lease on Thursday.  I've got orders in to start our gas service (complete with a gas stove!) and have the electric switched to our names.  I made chicken fried steaks for dinner and I had coleslaw while Dan and Livi had mashed potatoes.  Payton didn't like the potatoes.  Funny, he's eaten turkey/veggie meatballs in spaghetti, turkey/veggie meatloaf and then he turned down mashed potatoes.  Oh, and I turned in finance stuff and my work comp doctor's note.  There is still plenty left on my to-do list for tomorrow, but overall, I've been making steady progress.

I did not, however, do anything related to my PartyLite business today. Well, wait, I did set up a skype account so I can do a virtual meeting tomorrow.  But I didn't make any phone calls.  It's hard to balance everything in right now.  Right now though, the primary goal is to get through the move and go from there and make lots of business building calls tomorrow!

Dan and I were going to pack more tonight, but I think my spirit is telling me that it's weak tonight.  I'm going to head to bed to read a bit and then sleep.  Tomorrow is another big day.  :)

Day Thirty-four 08-23-2010

I'm tired.  It's been a long and pretty productive day.  I made eight PartyLite connections today.  I have one show that's working on guests and we'll set a date tomorrow.  I also have two people to call back tomorrow or Wednesday for dates.  Business is looking up.  And now that I have the time I need to support my hostesses, my shows will be more fun and more profitable!  And booking will be easier!  I have two new strategies that I want to implement.  One is Business-In-A-Box.  It's an organizational concept that should help me keep EVERYTHING more in line, not just my business.  Then there is sponsoring-in-a-box.  It's a fun, interactive way to talk about the PartyLite opportunity at shows.  I'm starting to feel the momentum building.  :)

I went to Prompt Care today to have my hip looked at. I hurt it on the 12th.  I fell at work because the night staff person sprayed Pledge on the vinyl flooring because it looked like wood.  How crazy is that?  The weird thing is, Dan knows exactly how I feel.  Back when he broke his leg in two places, it was because he walked down wooden stairs that had been Pledged to make them look shiny and nice.  It works.  But it makes things VERY slippery.  So, anyway, they did x-rays and said my hip is fine, but I have to go back on the 1st.  I'm supposed to use moist heat and anti-inflammatory medicine, like Tylenol or Advil.  What I'm wondering is if I really need to take any additional anti-inflammatory stuff if I'm already taking magnesium?  My health program includes magnesium specifically for its anti-inflammatory properties and I'm taking 584 mg or 146% of the recommended daily allowance.  And if magnesium reduces swelling, and inflammation is what is causing the pain, how much more pain would I be in without the magnesium?  I really wish I had a good doctor again.  I miss Dr. Belt, but I can't afford to go to the other doctor she recommended.  Maybe if I can find a good chiropractor in the area, that would help with a lot of it.  I'm sure my hip would be in better shape.

I started packing the kitchen and continued to work on my desk.  I picked up some Sparboe Farms (salmonilla free!) egg boxes at HyVee.  They are just the right size for packing and moving.  We have about 25 so far and we should get about that many again on Wednesday.  Tomorrow, I want to clean out the hall closets and the cabinet under the bathroom sink.  Then, it's into the scary garage.  Wish me luck!  :)

Once again, my calories are fairly low, but my cholesterol was really high and my sugars were a little high.  Oh, I found my tape measure so Dan can help me with my measurements again.  Surely this time we will see some kind of changes.  I'll keep my fingers crossed!

Day Thirty-three 08-22-2010

What did I do today?  I did not go to church.  I read some and I made some PartyLite calls.  We had a nice lunch and did some grocery shopping.  I cooked up some turkey/veggie meatballs, some turkey/veggie meatloaves and some turkey/veggie burger stuff.  I have six ziploc baggies of meat ready for use in anything I can use hamburger in.  Payton has eaten veggies two days in a row.  Thanks again, Cyndie!  I sorted through a lot of paperwork, separating stuff from my old job from my Partylite and our personal stuff. 

Today was kind of hard in a way I hadn't really expected.  I mean, I thought I would have a lot more trouble with the whole concept of not having a job.  I figured I'd be all stressed about money by now.  I can feel that building, but I'm not doing too bad yet.  What is bugging me is hearing my guys in the kitchen at meal time.  I hear them and I wonder how they are doing next door.  I think about my guys and then I realize that they aren't really MY guys anymore.  And it's easy enough to go over and say hi for now . . . but next week we'll be moving and the week after that, Dan will work in the evenings while the kids and I are at home.  Across town.  Dan's only going to see Payton on weekends he sees Ash, unless we can come over and hang out a little in the evenings, but with Payton's homework, I don't know how much we can do that.  I know I won't see Dan quite as much, but I also know that the quality of our time will be so much better.  I will miss our guys and I will miss Sharan as I won't see her as much either.  But we are going for quality time now.  Dan will be working fewer hours for more money and we can work towards better things.  There's no way to get around how much I will miss the guys.  But I have to look after my family first.

Day Thirty-two 08-21-2010

We headed to Salina to take candles to my niece, Tereya, that people had ordered from her PartyLite party.  It turned out that she and her little guy, not quite a year old yet, were at the hospital.  Camryn had a bad cough and his oxygen level was low, so they decided to keep him over night.  T and I talked and she may be starting her own PartyLite business.  She has been thinking of starting a home business so she could stay home with Cam full time and she ended up quitting her part time job because she wasn't even getting 20 hours a week.  By the time we left, T had relaxed a bit.  I also dropped off the orders from her show.  After we got home, I called and talked to her fiance, Dameon.  He told me that Cam's oxygen was up and he was feeling better.  Still staying overnight just to be on the safe side. 

I'm keeping my calories down a lot better and I don't even want to eat as much at a meal as I used to.  But I still need to balance the types of things I am eating better.  But it's still progress. 

I can't get my food log to upload tonight.  I had 1973 calories.  Fat, sodium and cholesterol were all just a tiny bit out of what livestrong.com recommends.  Hopefully I'll be able to upload it later.  :)

Day Thirty-One 08-20-2010

Livi was still sick this morning.  Dan was up with her until after 3am.  Then I was up with her again at 4:30.  After that, she slept until eight thirty, so I was hoping she was good.  Not yet though, poor thing.  She felt warm, but not fevery, but I gave her a children's tylenol anyway.  Dan and I had a ton of things to do today, so she stayed here and our friend, Sharan, kept an eye on her so we could take care of things.  First, we hit HyVee and bought some Pedialite to make sure she was hydrated. 

Next stop, we headed for the office to talk to HR.  We asked our questions and left.  Molly didn't know the answers so she had to call someone else and call us back.  We let them know that Dan will continue to work as a teacher and I will not.  Dan will work his schedule next week, and then take a week of paid time for the week that we can get moved into the trailer.  I am not getting paid for my 99.75 hours of time.  Because the terminated our position.  It's this odd hybrid of fired and quit so that they get the best of both worlds and I can't help but thinking that it's just not quite legal.  Now to decide whether it's worth following up on that.  I mean, at minimum wage, that's over $700.  But how much would a lawyer cost?  And I suppose I would have to pay first and then get whatever.  Probably not worth the trouble, but I might check into it anyway.

When Molly called back, they said that Dan will have to work the 3pm-11pm schedule when he comes back from PTO even though he asked for 7am-3pm.  So he'll be at work when Payton's in school and I'll be a single mom during the week.  He'll see Payton and Ashlynn both only every other weekend.  That really pisses me off, but they have already shown that they are not concerned about our family so I am not really surprised.  Just annoyed.  I can't wait until Dan can find another job and quit this one.  He didn't get into the dealer school this time because the said he didn't have enough customer service experience.  That's almost all he's ever done, so we need to figure out how to rework his resume.

We got Dan's new driver's license today and then we picked up Payton and headed for the ARC to view the homes available and pay our deposit.  Dolora showed us the one we had applied for and another trailer that was available.  The second one is $30 more a month, but a whole lot nicer.  The one we applied for still smelled like dog and they were going to be cleaning it next week.  The one we picked just got new carpet.  She said that she'll start them cleaning it up on Monday and we should be able to sign papers and pick up the keys on Thursday or Friday.  That will give us just under a week to get all of our boxes and things moved.  I plan to be packed and ready to go by then so we can rent a truck and make quick work of it.  One friend offered to watch Livi if we need her to. 

I called the parents of the guys we have been working with.  Both were concerned for us and let us know to call if we need anything.  One asked if we had to move right away and if we had a place to go and told me that if I had to get a new phone number to make sure to call him and keep in touch.  I almost feel like I'm losing kids.  *sigh*  It's so hard when your home, your heart and your livelihood are all tied up into a job that is taken away. 

We have some furniture we have to get rid of.  I might have to get rid of my desk.  :(  It won't do well in storage.  We have Dan's grandma's bed and couch that we can't keep anymore.  You know, Dan should probably call his momma and update her.  I have to start updating our address everywhere . . . I need lists!  I am lost without lists!  This is gonna be some ride!

This is going to be so much better for our family.  I'll be able to focus on my PartyLite and my kids and keeping up with the house.  Dan and I will both have more free time and we can start scheduling exercise.  It's just going to be yucky while Dan is working 3-11s and only seeing Payton on weekends.  I really expected to be more worried, but I'm kind of excited about a new adventure even while I'm frustrated at how we have been used and abused.

I had a donut for a snack today.  Not a great choice and I had a little too much at supper.  Tomorrow I will go grocery shopping.

Day Thirty 08-19-2010

Livi was up sick last night and she was sick again this morning.  She was good until lunch time and then sick again in the afternoon.  We had  couple good hours before bedtime, but then she got sick again at ten.  Once that passed, she crashed.   Poor thing.  :(  Hope she sleeps through the night.

Our application was approved today for a trailer.  We won't be in the park we expected to be in, but the rent is pretty good.  We checked out the place from the outside today and it looks nice enough.  And I'm pretty sure that we're only a couple lots down and across the street from an old friend.  We get the keys on the 30th.  I was hoping to be able to move in over a couple of months and once housing was no longer an issue, reevaluate our employment situation.

I called the company that oversees our company about the complaints I have made to HR and about HR that have been ignored.  A hostile work environment and sexual harassment should not be ignored.  It has been over a month now since I lodged my complaints and nothing has been done.  Unless you count the ridiculous write-ups that Dan and I received last week.  I had been considering this for a week now since someone suggested the move and provided me with the phone number of the director.  I finally decided today that it needs to be done.  If this ruins my opportunity to work with a company that would treat me this way, well, I don't really want to work for people like that anyway.

About ten minutes after that call, Dan and I were summoned by HR for a meeting. It was 11:30 and the meeting was scheduled for 1:30.  Our day staff agreed to keep an eye on Livi, too.  Jokingly, I asked Dan if he was ready to get fired today and he said, "Yeah, I think I am."  As it turned out, we that was a good thing.  We haven't been fired, exactly.  They terminated our position as a couple.  We are both welcome to take positions as teachers because they don't want to lose Dan and if I want to quit, that's ok too.  They pretty much made it clear that I'm the one they want to get rid of.  Dan felt that too.  So, tomorrow, we have to go back and talk to HR and ask a few questions and finalize our decision.  She asked us then what we wanted to do and I said, "We want to go home and discuss this and we'll let you know tomorrow."  And, since they offered us other positions, if we don't stick around, we have quit, they did not fire us.  No unemployment that way for them to pay.  Nifty trick, really.  The crazy thing is, the best reason they could give us for terminating our position was that our house was not clean enough.  Not the clients' home, ours.  I asked on Monday, when someone was sent to invade our privacy and take pictures, what the major issue was because we were really not sure.  She said that there are too many things cluttering up the kitchen counter and that my desk was too messy.  That was the best they could give us.  I'm guessing they were really not happy about my complaints last month.

After a lot of talking, we are pretty sure we know how we want to proceed from here, but we have a few questions for HR before we give them our final decision.  I can't help thinking that this is really great opportunity for us, in the long run.  Right now, things could be a little tight, but we've been through worse.  This will allow me to work my PartyLite full time and I'll be able to set up a schedule for exercise and riding my bike.  The only problem I foresee is how to make things work if Dan gets to do the dealer training that he applied for.  With one car, our gas consumption is going to increase dramatically.  I'll have to drive him over and come home so I can take Payton to school and then drive back over to pick him up.  Thank goodness I'll be able to take a nap later in the day!

I started my nutrition program today.  I need to get snack stuff.  I'm supposed to be eating two snacks a day and I usually don't eat any.  Today is payday, so snacks are officially on my shopping list.  :)