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| Moments |
You know I haven't always been this way.
I've had my moments, days in the sun,
Moments I was second to none.
Moments when I knew I did what I thought I couldn't do.
. . . .
Lookin' at me now you might not know it,
I've had my moments.
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I have loved this song since the first time I heard it. The harmonies are as moving to me as the message. The song just carries me away with it and I'm in it for a few minutes.
Today, it really hit me harder and in a different way than it usually does. I really connected with it on a new level. I have been to the point of suicidal thoughts in the distant past, and to the point of thinking that my existence was truly inconsequential in the far too recent past. But you know, I HAVEN'T always been this way. I know I've had moments where I truly believed that I was pretty awesome. I remember there was a time when compliments didn't completely shock me and my first thought wasn't disbelief or cynicism.
I just wish I could remember that feeling. I can't help thinking that if I could reconnect with that part of me, I could get to a better place. But, I don't really want to be that me again. I just need to find a blend of that optimism and energy so I can mix it up with the experiences that have shaped me. Then with a little "new" me and a little "old" me, I could truly be, "New and Improved!"
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